everything has a story

This week-end my son had his senior recital.   Getting to this point was no easy thing for him.    If  I were to list all of the various road blocks that he has faced you would quite possibly think that I was making some of them up.  It is no wonder that many music majors never finish.

His recital was mostly classical numbers.  This was a switch from the style I was used to hearing him play.   Yet it really showed his level of ability.   He ended with a couple of jazz numbers.  It was phenomenal!!!

Getting to his recital was challenging for us.    As ministers, taking a week-end off requires advance preparation.   When the date was set we made the necessary arrangements but ……….. (yes there is a story).

I have been known to tell people that I would like to experience what “uneventful” is like — to be able to  tell this story — “We made the necessary arrangements.   We went.  It was wonderful.  We came home.   Praise God!”

It seems that everything in my life has a story behind it.  I used to wonder why and then  I realized that God is the greatest story-teller and that many of His stories seemed to be filled with great detail — quite eventful.  Why should mine be any different?

As our story seems to go,  plans changed.   We found out  our worship leader and piano player were not going to be there after all.  One by one our options for music fell through.  A little over a week before we were to leave and still we had no one for music.  Three days later we found out that we would also need to make arrangements in other areas that we thought were covered.

This was not going to be that uneventful story.  Maybe next time?

Why do some things happen?

Some things happen because the enemy of our souls is doing all he can to discourage us and push us to quit.  I also think that God allows some things to happen so that we grow in our trust in Him.   Another reason some things are allowed is because then we have no doubt that God came through in a huge way because it has God written all over it.  Finally, some things happen because we are then forced to make necessary changes in how we do things.

Changes …………… One thing that we are doing different now is how we do our trips back home.  Our trips  used to involve a lot of van time as we tried to see everyone.   Now we do a pool party at the hotel and anyone that can make it is welcome.    Sometimes things happen to force a needed change.

I can see this hotel change really being a good thing.  Here we are playing a ‘friendly’ game of UNO the night before the recital.

When all is said and done, we were able to find someone to cover music and the other necessary arrangements.      God came through in a huge way.   The recital was fantastic.  I am soooo proud of you Christopher!!!!!

til next time

life and death

Lately, I’ve been thinking about life and death.  Living is something that we do everyday.  You don’t even have to give it a thought.  Days turn into weeks and weeks turn into months.  Before you know it another year is gone.

On the other hand, death can take you completely by surprise.   One minute you are making plans and the next you get a phone call that changes your world.

A little over a year ago my most favorite aunt passed away.  It came as a surprise but yet not really.   I was unable to attend her funeral but I was  ok with that.  My aunt knew I loved her and that she had played a huge role in my early years.  She knew this because I told her many times.   I also wrote her a letter expressing my love and appreciation.   She was finally Home.   (home being heaven)

This Sunday I got word that my last living Aunt had passed away.

Sunday was a very full day for us.  We had 2 worship services, then grabbed a quick-lunch and headed to the town park.   The  local church bands  were coming together to have praise in the park.  In memory of 9 -11  the mayor also was going to address the crowd.

As we were pulling into the park,  I got the message that Aunt Doris had died.      This death hit me hard.  I didn’t have time to think about why this was.  People were everywhere.   We were to take the stage at 4:00.  People were counting on me.

Seriously, I didn’t know how that was going to happen.  It is just one more example, in my life, of how God comes through in amazing ways.  While we were sitting there listening to the other bands, God was ministering to my heart.

Then it was our turn.  This was our second year participating and it was absolutely the most fun I have had.    I made more mistakes than I care to admit.  That alone could have caused a melt down right there on the spot.  After all I was processing life and death.   My heart was overwhelmed.  This did not make a good combination for keeping it all together.

Yet again God came through.  In His infinite wisdom He gave me such joy and gladness.    Now He could have caused my fingers to do what they have done a thousand times but then would I have known He was right there helping me?  Probably not.   The realization that He was right there pouring peace and joy into my heart was beyond words.

Why was her death harder than the death of my most favorite aunt?  I have come to the conclusion that death can bring up a sense of loss of what could have been – what should have been — but what wasn’t.   I had long ago dealt with the issues concerning my aunt.   Yet her death brought sadness and loss to the forefront of my heart.

It has also made me more mindful of my life and my impact on those around me.    During practice on Saturday I told our band to be sure to smile because we do love to praise God  and we should be sure to show that.  I reminded them and myself of that before we went on.

Live life to the fullest!  Laugh as often as you can!  Love all those around you!  Choose joy!  Live out loud!

What are you showing people?

til next time

graceful

Growing old is all part of the progression of life.  Growing old gracefully is a thing of beauty.

Lately I have been feeling my age.  This came as a surprise to me because I pretty much have to do the math to figure out how old I am.  That is until lately.

I’m looking in the mirror and to my surprise my bottom eyelashes are gone.  Ok, they aren’t really gone but they are invisible.    When did that happen?  I used to have beautiful lashes that needed little mascara.   Somewhere  along the journey of life things changed.

Growing old gracefully……..

graceful –characterized by elegance or beauty of form, manner, movement, or speech;  elegant

Psalm 92:13-15 (NIV)

¹³ planted in the house of the LORD,
they will flourish in the courts of our God.
¹⁴ They will still bear fruit in old age,
they will stay fresh and green,
¹⁵ proclaiming, “The LORD is upright;
he is my Rock, and there is no wickedness in him.”

growing old gracefully (staying fresh and green) ……………….

til next time

being real

pressure………………..

unhealthy expectations…………..

manipulation………………

disapproval………………

a critical spirit…………….

In my experience with ministry, those five things seem to join hands and travel together.   For the unsuspecting Christian they can be a destructive force.  The good news is that we don’t have to give in to them.    But woe to the  one who is dishing them out.   (Proverbs 15:18, 28:25, 29:22)

(There have been times when I have wanted to go to a fellow pastor of a neighboring church and ask him if he is aware of what his “sheep” are doing?  But truth is -  he probably is aware and what he really needs is my prayers.  He also needs me to be an example to his flock.)

Here I am pressing ahead,  striving to live a life of obedience, dying to self, and walking in love when out of  “nowhere”  they show up.

Pressure (ever so subtlety) is applied for me to be who someone else thinks I should be.   Pressure for me to cave to their unhealthy expectations.

Manipulation is right there trying to convince me that I need to do what they won’t do – but think I should do.

I have learned (the hard way) that it is about pleasing God first.    So when I come to the decision that it is not what God wants me to do -  along springs up  their disapproval.

I really want to help people but  sometimes what they want will only enable them to stay stuck right where they are.  Give a man a fish and he has a meal but is dependent on you to give him another fish.  Teach him how to fish and he won’t go hungry.

If manipulation doesn’t work then disapproval and a critical spirit aren’t far behind.  When this is coming from a ‘christian’ my heart is truly grieved.   Oh that Christians would be careful not to be a tool used by the enemy to discourage or tear down another person, ministry, or church.   (Do you think there will be divisions in heaven?)

I don’t know anyone in ministry who wants people to not like them. That is just crazy.  Ministry  is about loving people and helping them to grow in their walk with God.   Yet, sometimes loving them means saying no.

When I am feeling pressure to conform to someone else’s plan I ask God to shine His flashlight on every aspect of my life.  — my motives, my actions,  my personality, my outlook, the way I express myself and the way I portray Him, the boundaries that I have or don’t have, my marriage, my family, the way I treat people, especially how I treat those who mistreat me, even the way I dress, the list goes on…………………..

Psalm139: 23-24    “Search me, O God, and know my heart;
Try me and know my anxious thoughts;
And see if there be any hurtful way in me,
And lead me in the everlasting way.”

Today I received a letter that one of our youth wrote for  a class.  It was about me and who she sees me to be.    It was so much more than that.  It was confirmation for me to continue to be me.  Sometimes that isn’t so easy because I allow  people to see into my fishbowl.   I am open about those times I fall short and how I handle that.   People see the real me.  I am probably not like their pastor’s wife.  In fact, I have been told that on numerous occasions.   My heart goes out to those pw’s who think they must have this image of perfection on display.

I am all about being real.  I love people even when it hurts.  I am not perfect but I am absolutely in love with the one who is.   That one is Jesus!

And I am blessed to be a part of a congregation that loves God and truly loves people.   We are walking our talk.   After all, that is what it is all about.

til next time