Living Life in a Fish Bowl!

Gloria’s take on life.

pastor’s wife – friends @ church

Friends – one of my favorite things to do is to just hang out with my friends.  It doesn’t really matter what we do.  Friends help you to not take yourself so seriously.  You should see the turtle visor I was given.  Yup I wore it proudly 🙂

While we were on our trip to Bellvue I saw this bird house.  You might not be able to see it, but there are 4 birds in this picture.  There were lots more, but the others were a bit camera shy.  Click here for other pics from that adventure.  I love how the birds are just hanging out enjoying the gorgeous day!! 

I was thinking today about friends.  Being in full time ministry it became apparent early on that there was a bit of an issue concerning friends within the church??

Now when we were involved in ministry in Minnesota it wasn’t an issue.  My sister was a short drive away.  I had many friends that were in ministry in the area.  I had friends from college that I could call on.  Not a problem. 

So the dilemma came when we moved far away from family and friends.  I had 2 1/2 year old twin boys and somehow I am suppose to make friends with other Pastor’s wives in the surrounding area??   Then add that 3 of the 7 ministers before us lost their license while serving at this church.  Actually most of them didn’t think we’d be here very long.

I am by nature a people person.  I love people.  So what to do??

I looked at the example Jesus gave us.  He ministered to many – gave of Himself.  He picked 12 to be closely associated with and of those – 3 were even closer. 

Now there can be a vulnerability in church friendships.  Nothing hurts quite like the wounds of a friend.  When that friend is a church member then it can cause additional problems.  However, I have found that God brings people into my life, sometimes for just a season.  Sometimes solely for my benefit.  Sometimes so that I can be a benefit to them.  Iron sharpens iron. Then there are those people who are brought into my life to work on reducing me to love.  

For me groups work the best.   First off, working two jobs doesn’t leave me much time.  Second, it allows anyone who wants to go to be able to.   We’ve done some crazy things as a group.  Once took an outing to a truck stop.  — Hey it is a great truck stop with fabulous food and a large store full of fun and unique gifts.   🙂  

The thing I do know is that each person should feel valued.  This is true whether you allow yourself to have friends within the church or not.  People need to know that they matter. 

I was at a pastor’s wives gathering awhile back and there was this woman who clearly has always made me feel invisible.  I won’t go into details because that is not the issue.  I have worked through all of that and have come to the conclusion that God uses it to remind me of the value of each individual.  The importance of being in the conversation when you are talking with someone.   I pray I never give reason for someone to feel that they are not valued. 

So friends within the church?  —  I’m at two services Sunday morning, Sunday school, Sunday night and Wednesday night — these women are more than just my friends – they are family.   Yes, there have been woman who have taken the ‘knife’ to me.  I can relate with David in Psalm 41:9.   Although, just because you have been wounded is not an excuse to stop letting others get close to you.   All the joy I would have missed had I decided to distance myself.  The joy far outweighs the pain.  

I thank God for all the wonderful women He has placed in my life.  Each one touches my life and leaves their footprints across my heart.

til next time


October 14, 2008 - Posted by | living in a fish bowl, Pastor's wife, relationships, twins | , , , ,


  1. Good blog, G! Really food for thought.

    You DO have a gift for making people feel loved and important. When I grow up, I want to be just like that!

    Comment by Cherie Bell | October 14, 2008 | Reply

  2. I notice that you did not include a picture of you with your turtle visor. I know that you have at least one.

    Comment by cgirod | October 15, 2008 | Reply

  3. Yay! Let’s see a pic of Gloria in a turtle visor!!!!!

    Comment by Cherie Bell | October 15, 2008 | Reply

  4. Good words, again, Gloria!

    Is it too late to throw in my request for a pic of the turtle visor?

    Comment by Ruthie Oberg | January 15, 2009 | Reply

  5. Cherie and Ruthie I will see what I can do about the visor. I have the picture somewhere. It really is a great visor!!

    Comment by Gloria | January 15, 2009 | Reply

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