Living Life in a Fish Bowl!

Gloria’s take on life.

:) first apartment :(

Bitter /sweet

sadness/joy

my baby/grown man

holding on/letting go

momma’s little boy/Galina’s boyfriend

Some people are sooo ready for their kids to get out from under their feet.  Some parents couldn’t wait for kindergarten to start.  Some parents dream of the day when their kids are grown and on their own.  Some parents — I am not ‘some parents’.

A new milestone has taken place in our household.  The first apartment.  🙂 this is Chris!!!  😦 this is mom.  Now truthfully I am excited for him.  I do remember how thrilled I was when I moved into my first apartment.  I remember thinking – it just can’t get any better than this!!!

I refuse to be one of those controlling parents. I remember coming home and sensing my mother’s disappointment when I wanted  to go see my friends.  In time, I pretty much caved to that pressure and my ‘old’ friends drifted out of my life.   I know now that my mom didn’t intentionally set out to do that.   She didn’t even realize she was doing it.  She just missed me so much. 

A big part of allowing our kids to grow up is letting go.  The big joke has always been ‘my apron strings”.  Oh, my friends like to give me grief, but my boys are well aware of the freedoms they have had.  Truth is my ‘apron strings’ were much more about involvement than they ever were about control.    So I take the guff that is dished out and sometimes wonder if I really should have held a tighter rein.   Yet, letting go is part of preparing them for life. 

Chris was home for a few short hours (ok 2 1/2 days) but it seemed like hours.   This is when the reality of the first apartment hit me in the heart.  Andrew is still in classes so the fact that last year at this time Chris had already moved home hadn’t really sunk in. 

In those few short hours that Chris and Galina (by the way, the more I am around Galina the more I see what drew Christopher to her – it is a pleasure getting to know her) were here I dug out the extras – silverware, pans, bowls, ect.  We went shopping for food, any utensils I didn’t have two of, more pots and pans, ect. 

As I am heading back to work (really regretting that I have to go back to work) Chris says to me, “Mom I am going to try to be home sometime in July.”    July??  over a month away July?? I give him a big hug  and tell him that would be great. 

I know that God will help me in adjusting to this next phase of my life.  The fishbowl is changing.  The water has been all stirred up.   I know that given time God will calm the waters and restore balance again.  It is all a part of growing up.

Oh this first apartment is bitter/sweet.  I miss him terribly and yet I am so very proud of him and the man he is becoming.

 til next time

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May 14, 2009 - Posted by | just thinking about stuff, living in a fish bowl, relationships | , , , , , , , , , , ,

4 Comments »

  1. So does this mean we stay with him when we go to Mpls?

    Comment by Pastor Curt | May 15, 2009 | Reply

  2. You’re taking me back, girlfriend.

    Pastor – 🙂 🙂 🙂

    Gloria – I remember going through that time of life wondering if I would EVER feel normal again. Asking every woman I knew (and a few poor souls I didn’t) who had been through it, if the awful ache ever went away. They would smile and say Yes, it gets better. But I had a very hard time believing them.

    It gets better…but still not normal.

    Love you, G. You’re in my prayers today.

    Comment by Cherie Bell | May 16, 2009 | Reply

  3. Curt, I’m thinking that we would get more sleep elsewhere 🙂

    Cherie, thanks for praying — keep ’em coming. I found myself talking to a complete stranger about this the other day — later I thought “what was that all about?” Glad to see I am not the only one 🙂

    Comment by Gloria | May 16, 2009 | Reply

  4. […] journey.  He is beyond ready for it, me not so much.  However, God helped me through Chris’ first apartment   (by the way Chris has not been home since May) and I know He will see me through […]

    Pingback by empty nest « Living Life in a Fish Bowl! | September 28, 2009 | Reply


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